We have spoken before on the subject of BDSM. Why is it that some people (not just women) want to be dominated? Is it just about sex? The answer to the second question is “no.” I have seen too many bondage videos that don’t end in sex. Personally, I find that difficult to understand, as does Bonnie, but if we have learned anything during the years we have been selling bondage furniture, it is that everyone is different.
Of course there are similarities in every situation: someone is dominant, someone is submissive. There is usually some form of “discipline,” etc. But beyond that are many variations.
For example, some people are able to have rooms dedicated to their fetish; others perhaps indulge only now and again. Some have nightly spanking sessions. Some only practice bondage but no discipline. Then, of course, some bondage is very mild, and some is more robust.
And all things in-between.
But, back to the “why.” Judging from my discussions with Bonnie, along with reading many, many stories from customers and others, it has little to do with being a doormat in one’s public life. In fact, many women who like to be dominated are quite the feminists in their normal day-to-day lives. But the fact of the matter is, many women (and many men) have fantasies about being submissive.
By the way, the men who have submissive fantasies are not necessarily gay. Some are pillars of business and society. They are in command of their companies, have stable, heterosexual family lives, etc. Perhaps there are just two sides to each person The more they control several aspects of their life, the more they want some sort of outlet for other aspects of their psyche. Who knows.
The above paragraph would not describe Christian Grey, the protagonist of the 50 Shades novels (and movies). He is a successful businessman, in control of billions of dollars and hundreds of employees. Yet he still wants to dominate young Anastasia. But remember, this is fiction.
All this to say, domination and submission is not some form of moral defect. It is a perfectly acceptable sexual outlet, as long, of course, as it is consensual.
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There are so many ways to indulge in bondage, submission, and discipline. You can use some soft ropes to begin, as we did, many, many years ago. I first purchased a rather tame small slapper, and a pair of less-scary nipple clamps. I am somewhat handy, so figured out how to have tie-off points in the bed frame for the ropes. Those days were great, even before we had some substantial bondage furniture, along with multitudes of toys.
Once you get into this lifestyle (even if you practice it in secret), you seem to crave more and more toys. That’s where a place like The Stockroom can come in handy. And, of course, Bonnie & Clyde Bondage Furniture. For the day you may graduate from the simple, and want something more. Don’t worry about it–just embrace it!
Until next time,
Clyde
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